32 weeks 2 days

thirty two weeks two days

32 weeks 2 days

32 & 2

These numbers have been

my hero and my haunting,

my hope and my worry, 

since i found out i was pregnant.

32 weeks and 2 days was the amount of time
I was pregnant with River
 when he was born. 

And although this pregnancy has been completely different from my first one,

those numbers have felt like a goal and a d-day. 

Both Skyler and I have talked about often how grateful we are for this baby girl, but also how scary it has been because of our last experience. We've kind of been on edge just waiting for something to go wrong, for HELLP to rear it's ugly head and be faced again with what was the most painful, scary, and difficult experience in my life. I feel Sky look at me with worry and concern, and about has a panic attack anytime I gasp at something (and poor guy I gasp a lot about almost everything). I hear the alarm in my mom's voice anytime I call her. I find myself thinking "I'm not broken, I am pregnant." 

This time around has been so different from the first. I feel so much healthier from the beginning and maybe my body learned a couple new tricks from the first time. I am so grateful for my wonderful doctors and the excellent care they have given me. Seriously I don't think i could do this without them, they have me on a pretty tight, but loving leash. I feel Heavenly Father's love and protection. I honestly don't know how this is going how it is,  but I know it is by and through the Grace of Jesus Christ. I feel empowered to do this thing that I could never do on my own.

And now that we've passed 32 &2, We find ourselves
Walking by Faith into uncharted territory,
with Hope as our anchor.

We are taking time to enjoy this pregnancy. I love to have Skyler feel the baby move, even though it freaks him out. I call him over whenever I feel her, and I love to see his eyes widen as she rolls and kicks his hand. I relish the moments I feel her moving, which is almost all the time, she's very active. River talks to her through my belly button and tries to tickle her. The funniest is when he lifts up his shirt, pats his tummy, and says in a strain grunt, "My Baby in here". One night as we were rocking before bedtime, River was laying on my belly and baby girl started to kick. He looked up at me and smiled when I asked him if he could feel Baby sister kicking him. It was a bonding moment. 

 You know, I might still get HELLP, but I also might not. But at this point, reaching our 32 weeks 2 days, I feel more confident that our baby will be ok because although River had a tough beginning, I see what a wonderfully active, smart, and healthy boy he is. It is all in God's hand, and i am trying to just trust in Him and avoid to many stretch marks ;).

So here's to moving forward in faith, and trying to pick a color for the baby's room.

CHEERS!

And also some extra photos because sometimes what's going on in the background is more fun, like River chasing Charlie off the bed with a Broom.

Ha Ha, Silly Goose, You always make me laugh!

The Airplane Restaurant

So we decided to take a River on an adventure to eat lunch on an airplane.

First of all, you have to understand airplanes or rather "zooms" as they are refereed to in our household, are River's favorite things. He loves all things planes, especially when he gets to fly on them. He has literally claimed every Southwest plane as "my zoom".

So of course we thought he would love the experience of eating lunch at the Airplane Restaurant in Colorado Springs. We didn't realize how far south it was in Colorado Springs, so it was a really long drive, made even longer by crazy traffic on the freeway. We bailed off the freeway because pregger-lady was getting sick from on the stopping and going and found a lovely scenic drive through Monument. Thanks sky!

River loved eating lunch in the plane. Actually he loved going up and playing in the cockpit and pretending to fly the plane. Eating lunch became a secondary focus for him and all he wanted to do was keep going back. 

Now the restaurant and food itself, well it wasn't anything spectacular, but seeing River in the cockpit "flying" his first plane, well that made it worth it.

Perhaps he'll be a pilot some day, and we can bum free flights off him, 

now wouldn't that be lovely? :)

PS. I know I'm a little bit of a Nerd, but I like when these boys dress a like.

Numbered

I feel them slipping away.

The days we have as just us, Mommy & River, 

are numbered and the number is getting smaller.

I treasure our cuddles together on the couch in the morning in our jammies. You cuddle around my growing belly and I smell your sweet little boy smell and stroke your strawberry blond hair. I love holding your hand, when you'll let me, and the way you call my name followed by "wooh-hoo" when you want me to come with you. I secretly love that every night is "mama's turn" to put you to bed and how you fall asleep on my shoulder while I sing to you and rock.

I love your giggle, your naughty laugh, how you torment Charlie because you just love him so much. I love how affectionate you are, giving kisses when you are about to overflow with being happy because we are doing something you love. You love people deeply and get so excited to see your friends and family. You are sweet, mischievous, naughty, adroable, kind, funny, emotional, wonderful and much much more. I love you so that my heart might burst. You'll always be my baby.

So my little goose, let's treasure the "you and me" days

and then welcome our new baby sister into the pack 

with open arms and loving hearts the day she arrives. 

But until then, it's time to play hard. 

Happy Birthday Sky Pan!

I will live in never-never land with you for always

with our lost boy and indian squaw.

Being with you is always an adventure!

Happy Birthday!

"poop"

After a week of the worst GI track Virus I have ever seen, 

it's nice to finally see this guy smile and eat breakfast.

This week, River has learned two new words . . . .

"poop" and "blehh" (throw up)

The experience was traumatizing for all involved, 

but poor poor River. It was heartbreaking!

And being almost 7 months pregnant and Sky traveling, I was just doing my 

best to stay on top of it and survive.

My house smelled of a wonderful mix of throw up, poop, and desitin. 

But we did it! 

And Luckily Skyler came home just in time for me to get it.

You know you married a good one, when on father's day

he's taking care of you and working on your kitchen 

project for you. Thanks sweetie!!

But a little ray of sunshine, the way he says "poop" is so cute!!

Something in how he says his "p"s.

Well maybe this is the experience that will open the door to successful potty training, 

because he definitely knows what it means to poop now.

"POOP"

Harry Bird

This boy graduated high school today.

This is "my" boy (I only use quotations because technically he's my nephew),
so it's strange and amazing to see him become his own man. 

This is one of my regrets of not living in utah near family. I missed seeing him change from a boy to a man. So when we go back to visit, I still see him as the little boy that called me Siddy, claimed me as his girlfriend, pushed his little push-mower all over the place, loved daniel boone (with matching raccoon hat), sang with the Wiggles at the top of his lungs, and generally stole my heart with every giggle, every hug, and basically with every little thing he did. He was the first boy to hold my heart in his little hands.
I was smitten and lived being his aunt.

It wasn't until I saw him through my camera lens that the years finally
caught up to me, the time freeze I held him in melted away,
 and I saw him for what he has become -

a wonderful, exciting, handsome, and accomplished young man, 

with the heart of a lion - fierce, protecting, royal.

What wonderful adventures await you my Harry Bird.

We are proud of you!

A Snowy Memorial Day Mountain Adventure

We started off our Mountain adventure with a stop in Idaho Springs at the Famous Beau Jo's Pizza, where they make Mountain Pies with thick bread crusts. Thanks to Beau Jo's, Riverboy learned a new word, "honey", which sounds just as sweet as it tastes when he says it. The Pizza is yummy but the best part is the thick bread crust that you put honey on and enjoy "as a dessert". Or if you're River you just eat the honey right off your finger. 

via

As we climbed higher into the mountains, the mount of snow there was shocking, About 2 ft in some areas. It was a winter wonderland up there, but the crisp clean air was definitely refreshing. We made our way towards Berthoud Pass, stopping at a waterfall on the way to play and explore. River loved it. He and Skyler explored and climbed around the rocks, as I fretted and worried. "Skyler, hold his hand!" escaped my lips a number of times, but as true adventurers they were happily and fearlessly exploring. River dipped his fingers into the freezing water and threw rocks followed by giggles.

He shuffled his feet through the snow patches and thought it was awesome. 

We went up and over the pas and dropped into Winter Park, CO, where we found a killer playground that even had a rock-like climbing wall, called the Hideaway Park right off  the main street. Talk about hours of entertainment. River loved running around and playing and going down the giant slides. He must have been throughly worn out because he slept the whole car ride home. 

It was really nice to get and see some new scenery. The rain here has been aweful and I was beginning to feel a little trapped in our suburban-subdivision life. Thankfully my sweet husband whisked us away to the mountains, where small little towns and high snowy peaks refreshed my imagination and sense of wonder.